Monday, January 21, 2008

Cake, Coffee, Cookies and a Hefty Goal.

Since you're obviously dying to know what life has been like for since my last post, I'll tell you. It's been pretty good. I've had a few rough spots here and there during meal times, but I'm pluggin' along on my road to recovery. Unfortunately(even though you probably don't want to know this part)I more than likely have IBS. If you don't know what that is, then google it, because frankly I don't feel like explaining it right now.

And now that you know my gurgly insides, let's talk about FOOD!
The only baking I did recently was a Devil's Food cake for my dad. I made it especially for the Chargers vs. Patriots play-off game on sunday. We didn't have the ingredients I needed to make my own batter and/or frosting, so I had to opt for another box cake mix that had been shoved to the very bacl of out pantry to be rightfully shunned. I was really surprised we didn't have everything I needed to make a real homemade cake. Usually we have more of that stuff laying around the house than actual food. I contracted the "baking bug" from my father, who used to be a Home Ec teacher, so I'm used to being able to go will-nilly with baking due to a surplus of yummy ingredients. But alas, now he is aiming at being a history teacher and baking history books isn't nearly as tasty. Or normal. Anyway, I didn't have any vanilla frosting leftover nor the option of making my own, so I was left with bright pink strawberry frosting. Now, my dad doesn't really like strawberry flavored things(except for actual strawberries...)and pink doesn't exactly scream "FOOTBALL!" Luckily, I discovered half a jar full of Nutella and we all know that Nutella saves everything. Even if it's not used as a spread, even if it's just licked off a spoon or slurped off your hand promptly after shoving into the jar, it makes EVERYTHING better.


I stayed up pretty late making it, but that's just how I roll. It came about nicely. I added chocolate chips to the cake batter, used Nutella for the frosting and mini marshmallows to write "GO CHARGERS!" on the cake. Well, actually, the so called mini marshmallows were still too big for the cake and I couldn't fit everything on it. It ended up saying "GO CHRGRS" instead. I figured my dad was smart enough to get the basic jist of the message, though. But I don't think he would have cared if it said "OMGWTFBBQLOLZ" because it was basically a giant slab of chocolate heart attack masked as a cake. Despite the poor spelling, my dad assured me that enjoyed the cake. It became pretty evident as the cake kept enduring more and more battle wounds(much like the football team) throughout the day. I think it had to do mostly with the fact that the Chargers weren't doing so well and my father was trying to drown his sorrows in nutella and chocolate. Oh...and I picked at the frosting. And the cake. A lot. The following pictures are the chronicles of the death of the chocolate cake. They are slightly graphic and definitely not for the faint of heart:


Unlike the game, the cake was definitely slaughtered. This is almost sad. Notice how most of the frosting is gone and the cake is falling into bits. I have to admit, this is mostly my fault. I can't resist Nutella frosting and I've been trying to dig out just the chocolate chips in the batter. I'm horrible. I know.


To back track just a bit, before coming home to make the Charger's cake for my father, me and my long time gal pal, Brittany decided to get some coffee. Our original plan had been to go to Dagny's Cafe downtown because: 1.)They aren't a big chain coffee shop, so they're cheaper and more personable. 2.)Downtown Bakersfield is kind of cute, when it's not being creepy. 3.)I think the guy who works there is cute. Really cute. We got there around 7:30pm and guess what? THEY WERE CLOSED. How the hell can a coffee shop be closed at 7:30pm on a saturday night? It's safe to say I was outraged. I really wanted good cheap coffee and I really wanted a cute guy in to serve it to me. But instead of getting what I wanted, we ended up at a...DUN DUN DUN....Starbucks. Ok, I don't hate Starbucks, but I do prefer smaller coffee houses than giant chain world corporation type ones. It was fun anyway. Brittany ordered something with soymilk and I ordered a giant cup of black coffee. Yeah, I'm the jerk who goes to coffee shops to purchase coffee that I could have made at home.







Anyway, we sat in there for about 2 hours catching up, making fun of people and freezing half to death. Now, I know Bakersfield is the desert, but it is winter and it does get cold. That's generally what happens everywhere during the winter season. But apparently the staff at the particular Starbucks we were at thought that it was 100 degrees outside. You know when your nose gets so cold that it starts to run and no matter how many times you use the back of your hand to wipe it, it just keeps coming out? That's what I had going on. Which brings me to my next point: How does so much snotty liquid come out of such a small hole in our nose? It just doesn't seem like it should be possible.

Moving on....



The next day was sunday, the day of GLORY to be more exact. By that I mean: MY GIANTS BEAT GREENBAY AND WE'RE GOING TO THE SUPERBOWL OH MY GOD I AM SO EXCITED I CAN'T STOP SHOUTING HOW DO YOU LIKE MY RUN-ON SENTENCE?!
Besides that, nothing much exciting happened that day.

Me and my mother stopped by another Starbucks earlier today where I purchased another giant coffee and some cookies. The man who made my coffee put 4 extra shots of espresso in my drink. Why? I'm not quite sure. My mother said it was his way of flirting with me, but I don't think that makes much sense. What good is it going to do him if I am in a cocaine like frenzy with terrible coffee breath? Does he find that sexy? If so, he needs more therapy than I do. Anyway, the cookies were a feeble attempt to satisfy my cupcake craving. Most of the Starbucks I have been to in San Francisco carry size-of-your-head cupcakes, so I made the mistake of assuming Bakersfield would be the same. Obviously I was wrong because I ended up with Valentine Day sugar cookies instead of a cupcake the size of my labrador/retriever mix dog, Bruno. I don't normally eat plain sugar cookies because my tastebuds find them incredibly boring and insulting to the cookie world. Plain dough should be doctored up with as much fat and chocolate as possible. Plain sugar and batter just seems like such a waste. They were actually really good, though. Which I guess means that it wasn't actually a "feeble" attempt to settle my sugar craving....Ooops. I'm really picky about any kind of cookie I eat so I was surprised at how good they were. They definitely didn't disappoint me.

Oh look, it matches my sheets.

Now on to something slightly less important but possibly just as important because it has to do with good food:

I am a woman on a quest. I have compiled a three page list of restaurants(all organized into groups depending on the type of cultural cuisine, because I'm not obsessive compulsive at all.)in San Francisco that I plan on eating at. Part of my recovery plan is to eat out once a week, so it almost works out perfectly. Now I just need money...But alas! I have faith that my plan will succeed! And yes! I do plan on eating at every single place I wrote down. I also plan on dragging unsuspected prey(my roommate Katherine)with me on my quest as well. It can and will happen folks. I will visit each place of eatery and then have to move to another city because I will have eaten at every place possible in the city.

It will be a glorious journey, my friends. Simply glorious.

--Teenie

1 comment:

Bruno's Shadow said...

The cake met it's final demise at 4:12 a.m. on Thursady. It did not go quietly.
Booooo Eli Manning.
Dad